When I was journaling about my brother David, I pictured myself as a little girl hiding behind a door. I was scared and frightened to open the door to anyone. Jesus was standing on the other side of the door and I was afraid to open the door to Him. I wanted to stay behind the door because it felt safer. I wanted a guarantee that I would be safe if I opened the door. Jesus began talking to me. Continue reading “Behind the Door”
When I was 5 1/2 years old, I became a big sister. I was so happy to have a little brother to love. His name was David. He had the cutest big brown eyes and chubby little cheeks. I thought he was the cutest baby that had ever been born. I did all the talking for him. My mom was concerned that he didn’t talk like others his age, so she took him to the doctor. He said, “Why should he? He has a big sister that talks for him.” (I think the doctor might have been implying I talk too much!) Continue reading “David”
My father was a football coach and he used many sayings to motivate his players. One of his favorite sayings was “Pain doesn’t hurt.” He used this saying on the football field and off. Even with his family. I knew he used it to motivate his players to push through their pain during many grueling practices and games but that saying also had a big effect on me. It made me think that my pain really didn’t matter. I just kept going and didn’t say anything. I just kept shoving the pain down inside me. Continue reading “Pain Doesn’t Hurt”
I have shared with you my love for movies filled with intrigue and mystery. There is a movie called “A Few Good Men”. It is about the court- martial of two US Marines on trial for the murder of another marine. Tom Cruise plays the lead defense lawyer trying to exonerate the marines accused of the murder. While investigating the murder, he finds out that the marines were under orders by their commanding officer, played by Jack Nicholson, to commit the murder called a “Code Red”. Tom’s job is to get Jack Nicholson to admit that he issued the order to have the marine killed. There is an epic courtroom scene when Jack is on the witness stand and Tom is trying to get him to tell the truth. Tom yells, “I want the truth!” Jack responds by yelling, “You can’t handle the truth!” Continue reading “You Can’t Handle the Truth!”
In case you didn’t know, there is a disease out there called Stinkin’ Thinkin’. (You need to say it with a southern accent) A lot of people suffer from this disease. I didn’t realize I had it until I started going through counseling and my counselor pointed it out to me. This disease distorts the way you look at everything. It had taken over my thoughts and was making the panic attacks much worse. Continue reading “Stinkin’ Thinkin’”
journey to joy 