Most of my life I felt like I was missing something. I guess you could say that even though I was a Christian, I really didn’t know who I was following. I knew I didn’t know God and His character even though I professed I did. So I decided that the only way I was going to know my heavenly father was to go on a God hunt. After reading and studying, I have found God to be so much more than I thought He was. I have learned that He wants to be a father to us. He wants to know our dreams, desires and needs. He wants us to tell Him how we feel and what we think. He wants us to know that He wants to be involved in our lives. He also wanted me to see Jesus as the physical representation of Him.
One day when I was journaling, Jesus wanted me to see Him playing games with me. He was laughing and smiling. He asked me what game I wanted to play. He said, “I want you to see that I love playing games with you little one. I want you to know that you are loved.” I replied, “I love seeing this side of you Jesus. I want to be with you and laugh and have fun! I want to enjoy being with you.”
Beth Moore said in her Daniel study, “He does what He pleases to accomplish His goals; and thankfully He is pleased to involve us in His process. After all, His entire point in creating us was to involve us in His life.” I don’t know how that statement makes you feel, but it amazes me that God wants us to be involved with Him in life! It’s like He is saying to us, “I formed you. I put everything into making you. You are so special to me. When I created you I knew I was making a masterpiece. You are my child and that’s why I love you. I couldn’t wait for you to be born. I want to take care of you. I am here for you no matter what. I want you to run to me when you need something. I want you to do life with me.”
Hide and Seek was the game that was ingrained in me when I was a child. As I grew older, the game became my life. I was the one hiding and He was the one seeking. I didn’t want to be found at first, but as time passed I wanted to come out from hiding and enjoy my Savior. I honestly didn’t know how to enjoy being with Jesus. It seemed like all I did in the past was tell Him my issues and ask for explanations. I didn’t know how to enjoy His company and just relax and have fun with Him. I know that might sound weird to some of you, but that is what He wants us to do.
Jesus came to set us free from whatever enslaves us. I was enslaved by so much fear and dread of being in trouble with Him. John Eldredge says these words based on Isaiah 61:1-3 in his book Captivating, “God has sent me on a mission. I have some great news for you. God has sent me to restore and release something and that something is you. I am here to give you back your heart and set you free. I am furious at the enemy who did this to you and I will fight against him. Let me comfort you. For, dear one, I will bestow beauty upon you where you have known only destruction. Joy, in the places of your deep sorrow. And I will robe your heart in thankful praise in exchange for your resignation and despair.” This is what He wants to do in all of us. He wants to restore us. He wants to set us free and give us back our hearts. He wants to give us joy where we have only known sorrow. He wants to bring beauty from our destruction.
I thought I was handling my destruction by putting a wall around me, but I was only making things worse because I wasn’t letting Jesus in to help me. It never crossed my mind to ask Him to help me because I thought I had to handle whatever happened on my own. I think John Eldredge said this, “The vows we made as children can be very dangerous things. They were made in pain and with very deep wounds. They form our belief system. We must renounce them because it unlocks the door to Jesus.”
I had to come to the point that I could say to Jesus, “What happened to me was wrong, very wrong. It mattered to me and hurt me deeply, but I release it and give it to you.” Being able to release my past is what helped me enjoy my time with Jesus. I got to the point where I had to give Him everything that happened and trust Him to take care of it. Instead of my time being filled with anxiousness, fear and dread, I began to look forward to sitting with Him and telling Him things and learning from Him. I started to open up my heart and enjoy His presence. Now, I can’t imagine going a day without interacting with Him. I tell Him how I feel and I ask for His opinion. I sing to Him and tell Him what I think He is thinking. I tell Him all the silly little things that I think. And yes, I tell Him what I think He should do. (I know He loves it when I do that!)
I think having a relationship with the creator of the Universe is the most rewarding work we can have while we are living on this planet. God made me; Jesus saved me; and the Holy Spirit gives me the ability to deal with my life. I want to live the rest of my days learning, enjoying and resting in Jesus. Even though we have lots of troubles here on earth, He overcame the world and so can we! So, I would like to encourage you to go on your own God hunt. Take some time today or any day this week and sit and look at God and enjoy His presence. Listen to Him speak to you. Grab a notebook and write down what He tells you or write a letter to Him. Tell Him how you feel. Sit quietly and ask Him to speak to you.
I would like to end with a statement from the movie Chariots of Fire. One of the main characters, Eric Liddell says, “When I run, I bring Him pleasure.” Oh dear friends, it brings tears to my eyes to know that I could bring my Lord any sort of pleasure, but I do, and so do you. He created us and finds great pleasure in that. It took me so long to see it! I pray your own personal God hunt helps you see how much He enjoys you and spending time with you! Until next time….
Jeremiah 9:24 “But let the one who boasts boast about this: that they have the understanding to know me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight, declares the Lord.”