Author: foolforchrist117

This post is going to be a little longer than normal, so please bear with me. I know this is going to be life changing for me and I hope it is life changing for you. For a very long time, I have struggled with keeping God present in my mind throughout my day. One of the main reasons why I struggle with this problem is the fact that I am addicted to “doing”.

I have been like this most of my life. “Doing” is how I cope with stress. I cram as much as I possibly can into my to-do lists. I don’t sit down for very long. I go, go, go until my body screams at me. Then, and only then do I stop. I am pretty pathetic! 

When I was reading the book “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality” by Peter Scazzero, I came across these words. “We go through the motions of doing so many things as if there is no alternative way of spending our days. It is like being addicted—only it is not to drugs or alcohol but to tasks, to work, to doing. Any sense of rhythm in our daily, weekly, and yearly lives has been swallowed up in the blizzard of our lives.” My life has definitely been swallowed up by so many things that aren’t good for me. I know I need to change. My body will completely fall apart if I keep driving it the way I do. 

Thomas Merton states, “There is a pervasive form of contemporary violence . . . activism and overwork. The rush and pressure of modern life are a form, perhaps the most common form, of its innate violence. To allow oneself to be carried away by a multitude of conflicting concerns, to surrender to too many demands, to commit oneself to too many projects, to want to help everyone in everything, is to succumb to violence . . . . It kills the root of inner wisdom which makes work fruitful.”

I have experienced many forms of violence in my life. Most of the violence came from other people, but now I realize that I have been committing violence to myself by overwork. I have caved in to the demands of others by saying “yes” when I knew that I should be saying “no.” I had no idea I was doing so much damage because I thought I was being helpful and I felt like my heart was in the right place. (Or at least I thought it was.) No wonder I forget about God during my day. I am so conditioned to pushing and pleasing others that I forget about God and what He wants for me.  

Scazzero tells us in his book that, “We need a rope to lead us home. God is offering us a rope to keep us from getting lost. This rope consistently leads us back home to Him, to a place that is centered and rooted.” Oh, how I long to be centered and rooted and not run down and worn out. God is my rope and I keep forgetting to grab on to it because I am so focused on getting things done. But, there is hope for all of us if we have the desire to make a few changes in the way we live our days. 

There are two ancient practices that Peter talks about in his book. One is called the Daily Office and the other is keeping the Sabbath. I was really intrigued to learn about the Daily Office. I already knew that I should honor the Sabbath, but have struggled doing it because resting is so difficult for me. What I learned from Peter, has helped me understand why doing these practices is so very important in my relationship with my Heavenly Father.  

“The Daily Office and the Sabbath, however, offer us a rhythm powerful enough to anchor us. Whatever catastrophic blizzard may be blowing in our lives, the Daily Office and Sabbath enable us to hang onto the rope (that is, God Himself) so we can safely make our way home.  They offer us a rhythm for our lives that binds us to the living God.” Scazzero 

Sign me up! I want to be bound to God. I desperately want to pay attention to God throughout my day and not let my to-do list rule me. Did you know that one theologian argued, “at the heart of original sin is the refusal to accept God’s rhythm for us?” OUCH! I guess I have been so ingrained in my “doing” that I haven’t stopped to think that my rhythm of life is a sin. I mean for goodness sakes, God rested. Why in the world is it so hard for me to rest or take mini-breaks throughout my day and focus on the One who gives me life? Is there anyone else out there that has a problem like I do? 

So let’s get to the nitty gritty. The first practice is called the Daily Office. It isn’t a quiet time. “The root of the Daily Office is not so much a turning to God to get something but to be with Someone.” Scazzero  I like to think of it as paying attention to God. I know I need to give Him a whole lot more of my attention than I do! If you want more detail on how to apply the Daily Office, I recommend reading the book. I got mine from Amazon.

I will touch on the four elements of the Daily Office. They are: stopping, centering, silence and scripture. The first is stopping which is pretty self-explanatory. Second is centering which involves being attentive and open, sitting still, breathing slowly and closing your eyes or lowering them to the ground. If your mind wanders, start breathing in and ask the Holy Spirit to fill you up. Then, as you breathe out, exhale all that is sinful, false, and not of Him.

Third is silence. Which is accompanied by solitude. I think both of these are hard for most of us. “Silence is the practice of quieting every inner and outer voice to attend to God. Solitude is the practice of being absent from people and things to attend to God.” Willard  That phrase “attend to” made me pause. I decided to look it up in the dictionary. The definition means “to be present”. When we take the time for silence and solitude we are tending to our relationship with God by being present with Him.  

Last is scripture. Pick something that is appealing to you. I like the Psalms so I am picking to focus on a verse or verses of Psalms when I do my Daily Office. Be attentive in your heart to what God is doing inside of you. Again, there is more detail in the book. 

The point is to be with God. To focus on Him. “The purpose of the Daily Office is to remember God and commune with Him all though our days. Keep that clearly in mind as you develop structures and habits that fit you.”Scazzero You can determine how many times a day you are able to be with God. You can also determine how long you are able to be with Him. I am usually able to get a good chunk of time in the morning. My struggle is pausing throughout the day. I am attempting to start out twice a day with the hope of adding more. What makes me want to do this is my love for God and a desire to connect more with Him than I do already. 

Now, on to the Sabbath. The Sabbath means “to cease, to stop working.” It means to carve out a 24 hour time period to quit working. To rest. “On Sabbaths we imitate God by stopping our work and resting.” Why is that so hard? Did you know it is the longest and most specific of the Ten Commandments? Sabbath is a gift from God that we are supposed to receive. We imitate God when we observe it. Think about that! 

The culture we live in doesn’t really help us observe that day. I have tried in the past to take the time to observe the Sabbath, but then I go back to “doing” instead of “resting”. The bottom line is God worked. We are to work. God rested. We are to rest. “To fail to see the value of simply being with God and ‘doing nothing’ is to miss the heart of Christianity.” Doohan 

I know this is a lot! It can be overwhelming! But, I keep thinking about the way the world is today. Most of us are struggling with the way things are. We all need ropes to hang on to! We see so many people “out of sorts” right now. If we could make a few changes in our routine during the day and turn our attention towards God, what a difference that would make in us and help us deal with the stress in our lives today. The Daily Office and the Sabbath can transform us. “Our human brain, our bodies, our spirits, and our emotions become wired by God for the rhythm of work and rest in Him.”Scazzero

I want to be wired by God and not by me! I am way too destructive. I think most of us have storms in our lives that make us need a rope to grab on to. God is the rope we desperately need. He is the only way we are going to survive. We have to realize there is great value in being alone with God and doing nothing.  

I am going to leave you with this beautiful, heartfelt prayer from the book. Until next time…

    “Lord, help me grab hold of you as my rope in the blizzard today. I need you. The idea of stopping to be with you one, two, or three times a day seems overwhelming, but I know I need you. Show me the way. Teach me to be prayerfully attentive to you. This idea of Sabbath will require a lot of change in the way I am living life. Lead me, Lord, in how to take the next step with this. Help me trust you with all that will remain unfinished, to not try to run your world for you. Set me free to begin reorienting my life around you and you alone.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

* Please note that I am just beginning to do this! I know it is going to be challenging and hard. I am going to have to show myself a lot of grace. I want more of God in my life and I feel like following these practices is going to help make it happen. If you would like to join me, please let me know so I can pray for you. And, I would love for you to pray for me too! Let’s do this!

I think we can all say that the last 6 months have been a bit unsettling. Emotions are controlling so many people right now. It is very scary and frightening for me to see people act and say things with so much anger and hatred in their hearts. I know from first hand experience the damage that is done to those around you when you act like this. The way people are treating each other with so much violence makes me cringe inside.

I wasn’t raised in a “safe” environment. So, all sorts of walls were formed around my heart and my mind. I had so many layers of protection to go through to get to what I was honestly thinking and feeling. Pretending was safer. “Being real” can still be hard for me, but it is the only way my relationship with Christ, my family and my friends is going to be where it needs to be.

I have learned a lot by reading “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality” by Peter Scazzero. This book is helping me understand that our emotional health is tied to our spiritual health. “Emotional health and spiritual maturity are inseparable. It is not possible to be spiritually mature while remaining emotionally immature.” Scazzero  I know this to be true because I ignored my emotional health for 40 years and it definitely affected my spiritual health. 

I think I had a breakdown of some sort shortly after I turned 40. Panic attacks hit me like a ton of bricks. Now, that I am able to process that time in my life, I realize that my brother’s suicide, two years prior, was the beginning of my emotional unraveling. I wasn’t able to process the impact his death had on me, so I buried my feelings, like I did for years up to this point in my life. I don’t recommend ignoring your feelings. I have learned since then to listen to my body when it is trying to tell me something. Your body doesn’t forget what your mind tries to bury.

Pain is a great motivator. God knew what it would take to open me up so I could move forward. I was really good at doing activities for God. But, being alone with God meant that I would have to face things that I really didn’t want to face, and also face the person I dreaded to face—myself.  When I started having those attacks, I couldn’t leave the house for several days. I was stuck, frightened and desperate. I was in so much emotional pain that it brought me to my knees (literally) and that is where God began to work in me. I knew I needed help and I knew things needed to change inside of me.

One of the first things I had to do was recognize I had feelings that were valid. For some reason, I developed the philosophy that my feelings were sinful. I guess I’m not the only one who feels that way. “It is more common, however, to encounter Christians who do not believe they have permission to admit their feelings or express them openly. This applies especially to such “difficult” feelings as fear, sadness, shame, anger, hurt, and pain. To feel is to be human. To minimize or deny what we feel is a distortion of what it means to be image bearers of God. To the degree that we are unable to express our emotions, we remain impaired in our ability to love God, others, and ourselves well.” Scazzero

We have to be honest with our feelings and get them out in healthy ways. I lied to myself over and over again that I either didn’t or shouldn’t have feelings over so many things. When you do this, you shut down your humanity. You shut down the core of who you are. You are lying to yourself and others, and most of all, you are shutting down your relationship with God. 

“God speaks to us through the raw material of our emotions. The issue isn’t to blindly follow our emotions-feelings, but to acknowledge them as a part of the way God communicates to us.” Ignatius of Loyola  I was severely impaired emotionally when I broke down. I went through so much abuse and cruelty that I actually thought I didn’t have a right to feel anger or sadness or hurt or pain. To this day, when I am asked how I feel, I really have to pause and process my feelings. I have to go to God and ask Him to help me. 

Acknowledging my feelings has not been easy. I have worked my butt off to move forward in my life. And, yes I still struggle with them. Now, when I get anxious, I go to God immediately because I know that I am safe with Him. I pray and ask for help and clarity with what is happening in my body. If there is something I need to confess, I confess it. If there is something I need to recognize, I recognize it. The other night I was struggling with anger over a comment that someone made, so I went to God and told Him how I felt and asked for help in processing my anger.

Sometimes I still wake at night in a panic. The first thing I do is say the name of Jesus over and over again. Then I tell Him how I am feeling and ask what I need to do. I just talk to Him and eventually it subsides and I am able to fall asleep again. The fact is my body will not put up with me hiding my feelings any more.  

“Emotions are the language of the soul. They are the cry that gives the heart a voice…However, we often turn a deaf ear—through emotional denial, distortion, or disengagement. We strain out anything disturbing in order to gain tenuous control of our inner world. We are frightened and ashamed of what leaks into our consciousness. In neglecting our intense emotions, we are false to ourselves and lose a wonderful opportunity to know God. We forget that change comes through brutal honesty and vulnerability before God.” Allender and Longman

For years, I was the person that “strained out” all the disturbing things that I saw or things that happened to me in order to be in control of my inner world. I was frightened and ashamed of my thoughts, so I tried to bury and hide them from God or anyone else that was close to me. Journaling has opened me up and given me the opportunity to have a voice before God. I have been as honest and vulnerable as I can be, but I know there is more inside that I haven’t gotten to yet.

If you are struggling with your emotions, please consider journaling. It is the best thing I have done to get closer to God. I have to get my feelings out and that has been the best way to do it! It is much healthier than yelling or screaming. You don’t damage your loved ones either. Give those feelings to God and ask Him to help you. 

Life is a process. Each layer I go through brings me closer to my feelings and closer to my Lord. I have learned that He wants my honesty. He wants me to tell Him how I feel. He wants to help me work through my issues and my emotions. It has taken me a long time to get to where I am now and I know I have a long way to go. But, each step brings me closer to where God wants me to be.

Talking to God about my emotions before I speak or act is hands down one of the best things I am learning to do. Who knew that it could be so wonderful to talk to Him first? I don’t always get this right, but when I do, the outcome is so much better than if I reacted to someone with words that I shouldn’t say. Wouldn’t the world be a better place, if we all could do this— especially now?! The phrase from this song just popped up in my head. (“Oh, Wouldn’t It Be Loverly!” from My Fair Lady. This is what happens when you are raised listening to musicals! ha ha!) But seriously, wouldn’t it be loverly if we could learn to deal with our emotions before we open up our mouths? Maybe make this a goal in your life?? I know I am!

Until next time dear friends……

Have  you ever caught yourself wanting to be like someone else? I believe as a woman we go through phases of wanting to look like or act like someone else. I remember when I was a little girl, I loved to play dress up and pretend I was someone else. Then as a teenager I would look at magazines and want to have the right clothes or the right haircut. I didn’t really have the money to dress like a lot of the girls I went to school with, so I constantly felt awkward in what I was wearing.

Then I went to college. It was a stretch financially for me to go away to school. I was desperate to find a group to fit in with. I had my friends, but I wanted a sisterhood, so I joined a sorority. I definitely wasn’t the girl with the cool clothes and I still felt awkward about myself. So many of the other girls were beautiful and had the money to spend on clothes that I didn’t have. I felt out of place because I was trying to fit into something that I knew inside wasn’t going to make me happy. I was placing my identity on what I looked like or did rather than on Christ. That has been one of my biggest battles. I have allowed so many other things to control me instead of Christ.

When I first met my husband, he became my focus. My relationship with Christ went into second place. Then, my children came along, and I did the same thing. I am such a pleaser and performance driven by nature that I allowed so many other things to become first or second before my relationship with Christ.

In my heart, I didn’t want that to happen, but time after time I found myself back in the same cycle of pleasing and performing for others, not God. I was a slave to it. My identity was wrapped up in what I did instead of who I was. I am better, but I still struggle with it because I still like to do. Not to say that “doing” is bad, but I can’t be a slave to it. 

I was struck recently by what C.S. Lewis said. “God became man to turn creatures into sons; not simply to produce better men of the old kind, but to produce a new kind of man. It is not like teaching a horse to jump better and better, but like turning a horse into a winged creature.” I am not on this earth to be a better version of myself, but I am here to be like Christ.

Since, my goal—our goal, is to be like Christ; not a better version of ourselves, we have to rely on the power of the Holy Spirit to do that. We simply can’t do this in our own power. We have a choice to make. Do we live like Christ or simply a better version of ourselves? “I get to decide moment by moment what I live for! And as heirs of God we get to live for Him!” Allen

I think the concept of being like Christ and thinking like Christ has hit me more lately than it ever has. I want the mind of Christ more because of what is happening in the world. I want to respond to things like He would want me to. And that takes a lot of effort! I have to be aware of what I am thinking and feeling which is not easy for me.

All of us have thoughts that consume us. We need to be aware of what those thoughts are so we can deal with them and bring them into the light. For instance, I mentioned in my last two posts that I have struggled with the thought “I am helpless.” When I was reading the book and doing the study “Get Out Of Your Head” by Jennie Allen, I came across a section in the study that really helped me.

Jennie puts lies we believe into three categories: I’m helpless. I’m worthless. I’m unlovable. I relate mostly to “I’m helpless.” (I didn’t realize that issue dominated my thinking so much until I did the study!)  She goes on to ask questions about where the lie came from and how this lie tends to play into your fears and anxieties. Those questions really helped me pinpoint when it started and how it is playing into my thinking. 

Next, she has you ask yourself if the lie is true and what God says about that lie. I looked up scriptures that helped me reinforce the truth that I am not helpless. Now, I have scripture to refer to when I start to go down that road in my thought life. Finally, there is one more question that she asks, “Am I going to believe God?” I have a choice to make. And, I want my answer to be a resounding “YES!”

The reason why I mention this process is because we have to be aware of the lies that might be behind some of our thoughts. “We don’t simply need our spiraling thoughts to stop, we need our minds to be redeemed.” Allen  Yes, this takes a lot of work, but if we can stop some of our thoughts and replace them with truth, then our minds can be renewed and redeemed.

“Paul had horrible circumstances, but his circumstances didn’t dictate his thoughts. It was his love of Jesus and trust in a good, loving, in-control God that consumed his mind and his purpose.”Allen  I have to confess that I have allowed so many of my circumstances to dictate my thoughts. I didn’t even realize that I was doing it. I didn’t know to be aware, to grab those thoughts and to bring them to God and expose the lies that they were. But, I know now. I don’t want to live my life allowing that to happen any more. I was to trust a good, loving and in-control God that consumes my mind and my purpose.

As I write these words, tears streaming down my face, I think I am the luckiest girl in the world because I have Jesus! Despite everything that has happened to me, I have Him and I always will. Oh, how I love Him! He is the one thing I want to be wholly surrendered to. I want a healthy mind trained on Christ and what He wants for me. When I set my mind on Him, freedom follows. Forgiveness takes place. Love abounds. Joy emerges. Peace occurs. Contentment is found.

We live in a fallen world. Evil is everywhere. But, we have a powerful source that is there to give us exactly what we need. We need to tap into it! We need to be aware of the lies that are assaulting our brains every day. We need to bring them into the light and ask for God to redeem them. We need to pray for one another and help each other get through the difficult times.

WE NEED TO BE HONEST with our feelings and our thoughts. That is so important for our mental health! Find someone you can trust and talk to them. Tell them what you are struggling with. WE NEED TO FIGHT FOR EACH OTHER, not condemn one another.

Look, I have always felt weird. I have experienced so many things that my friends haven’t. I kept it bottled up too many years. It took a nervous breakdown to expose the lies. I couldn’t have told you what the lies were until I started counseling, reading, and studying. I had to be aware of them before I could talk about them. Ask the Lord to help you expose them. Go to a counselor. Go to a person you can trust and ask for prayer. It is a process and it is hard work. But if you want a renewed mind, then that is what you have to do. Our minds matter!

I am passionate about this because I have experienced and seen what believing lies can do to myself and others. I have seen someone that I dearly love end his life because his mind was taken over by mental illness. Maybe someone needs to hear this. “I care about your mind! I care about what you think! Please take the time to care for your mind too because it matters!”

If I care that much, then think about how much more God does! He is there to help! Please reach out for help! The best thing I did was get help for my battered mind. 

Until next time….

Psalm 121:1-2  “I lift up my eyes to the hills — where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.”

* The picture above was from 50’s dress up day my senior year. 

In the last post, I talked about minding our minds. It is so important for our mental and emotional and even physical health to have a healthy thought life. Because of Christ, we have the greatest power within us to destroy the lies that have been ruling our lives. “You and I have been equipped with power from God to tear down the strongholds in our minds, to destroy the lies that dominate our thought patterns. We have the power and authority to do this.” Allen

The first thing to do is to recognize strongholds that you have in your life. What seems to dominate your thought life? Is it your children? Is it your marriage? Is it your job? Is it the crazy things that are happening in the world right now? Is it all of the above? Is it fear of this virus? Write down what it is.

For me, it has been all the crazy things that have been happening because of this virus. People have been scaring me by their actions and their words. Wearing a mask is a control issue for me. Someone else is controlling the way I live. I frankly don’t like that! It is disturbing to me that our lives are being controlled by the government. Because I am sensitive to evil and abuse, it has been very difficult for me to be “okay” with it. What are we allowing to happen to us? Should we be “okay” with it? Are we going to be like Nazi Germany and let someone dictate how we are supposed to live? Those are the thoughts that have been going through my mind. Those are the things that I have been writing down. (I know that I am a bit of a conspiracy theorist!)

I have to go to scripture when my mind goes to these places.

Psalm 60:11 “Give us aid against the enemy, for human help is worthless.”

Psalm 120:1-2 “In my distress I called to the Lord, and He answered me. Lord, deliver me from lying lips and a deceitful tongue.”

Psalm 121:2-3 “My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not allow your foot to slip; your Protector will not slumber.”

Psalm 119:81 “I have put my hope in your word.”

Our minds need to be renewed daily with truth. When I go to scripture and start reading, I begin to relax and calm down. God’s word is so powerful in my life. “We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ. Our tools are ready at hand for clearing the ground of every obstruction and building lives of obedience into maturity.” The Message 2 Corinthians 10:5-6

Y’all listen! God’s word is a powerful tool to smash warped philosophies!! We’ve got the best power in the world to wield! Instead of being defeated, we can beat anything that is ruling our lives. (I am speaking to myself as much as I am speaking to you.) God is so much bigger than anything that is coming at us—especially this terrible virus! We’ve got to tear down anything that goes against the truth of God! We’ve got to stand for truth!! If we don’t, then who will???

My mother has been stuck in lock down for 5 long months! I have seen her mind deteriorate before my eyes. The lack of social interaction has caused so much damage to her.  She is having trouble discerning what is true and what isn’t true in her mind. I have called the county and the state. I have called the place where she is living. I want to make a poster that says, “LET MY PEOPLE GO!” and post it out front of the building. I am fed up! But, I want to share with you something that was said during one of my many phone calls. I was apologizing for once again complaining and she said to me, “Honey, if you don’t advocate for your mom, then who will?”

If we don’t stand for truth in our lives, then who will? We certainly aren’t going to get it from the world. We aren’t going to get it from the news or social media. The only place we are going to get “truth” is from God. He only speaks truth and He doesn’t lie.

If we want truth, then we have a choice to make. “You are no longer a slave to passions, to lusts, to strongholds, to sin of any kind. You have a God-given, God-empowered, God-redeemed ability to choose what you think about. You have a choice regarding where you focus your energy. You have a choice regarding what you live for.” Allen

Those three words, “I have a choice,” are so powerful! I am not subject to my circumstances or my negative thoughts. I have a choice regarding who and what I live for. I can either let the world control me or let God control me. I don’t want fear or this virus or what may or may not happen control me. I have to choose to God.

“We are what we think. How we think shapes our lives. This is an other worldly way to live. You, as a believer, are a citizen of another reality.” Allen That philosophy explains why we are different from other people. When we believe in Christ and what the Bible teaches, it does set us apart from others. If you want to hang with the cool kids, then you’ve gotta believe that Jesus is cool. Do you get what I mean?

Look, I have spent a lot of years fighting this. When you come from an abusive home, you tend to have a victim mentality. I didn’t realize that I have a choice in the way I live. I just let things happen and thought, “I guess this is the way it is supposed to be. I guess God wants me to be like this. I will just be a good little girl and do what everyone tells me to do and be what everyone tells me to be.” I am mad as a killer hornet (just had to throw that in) that I allowed that to happen. And, I see it happening all around me. People are just giving in to all kinds of thinking.

WE HAVE TO STOP!!!! If our thinking doesn’t line up with the word of God, then it has to go away. We need to identify the lie, get rid of it and replace it with truth. Listen to this. “How often have we imagined someone’s anger toward us simply because of a sideways glance that had nothing to do with us. We build narratives that begin to take on lives of their own, based on assumptions and our overactive imaginations—all because we tend to fears, attend to distractions, attend to worst-case scenarios.” Allen

When I focus on my overactive imagination and assumptions, I forget that God is more powerful and perfectly capable of handling my life. I am fixating on something else besides Him. Right now, because I am so upset about my mom, I find myself fixating on the injustice of the situation. I go back to feeling helpless. I have to be aware that I have a choice to make. Am I going to let it eat away at me (and to be honest, I do that more than I should) or am I going to pray and trust God with it? I have made my phone calls and inserted my opinions as much as I can. The rest is up to Him. If I don’t do that, then my mind and emotions will spiral out of control.

Romans 7:14-25 explains the war that is going on within us. I am going to share a few verses. “For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.” verses 22-23 I would like to encourage you to read the whole passage. (There are a a lot of do’s and do not’s and it might require reading through a few times, especially for those elderly brains, like mine!) 

The battle is real but we can win! Maybe not every time, but we can grow stronger and learn and change. I don’t have to be a slave to sin or my emotions. I can choose to live for Christ. There is no other way for me because I want truth to reign in my life. Oh, how I pray for all of us to live that way!

Look, I know the struggle is real! I face it every day. I just have to let the Holy Spirit take over and get out of His way. My goal is to keep my eyes fixated on the truth that God wants in my life. I really want to be a willing servant and be helpful to others. I hope that this post has been helpful to you.

Until next time…

I am a person that craves truth. Because I am a follower of Christ, my life is based on the fact that Jesus is “the way, the truth and the life.” John 14:6 My relationship with Christ is the foundation of my life. I belong to Him. I base my life on the word of God. I love what Priscilla Shirer says about being a woman of God. “I am a woman who believes in every single thing that my God has declared to be true. I will stand firmly on the promises of God so I will be girded in truth.”

I have found that the only way I am going to survive in this life is to consume God’s truth as much as I possibly can. I must think the way He wants me to so I can have the best perspective. In order to do that, I have to be aware of my thoughts.

I recently started reading the book “Get Out Of Your Head” by Jennie Allen. If you are struggling with your thoughts, I highly recommend this book and study. It has really helped me through the last two months. Jennie states that there are three lies that we believe. “I’m helpless. I’m worthless. I’m unlovable.”

“These lies—I’m helpless, I’m worthless, I’m unlovable —shape our thinking, our emotions, and the way we respond to the world around us. They trap us in their cycle of distraction and distortion and pain, preventing us from recognizing the truth we should believe. Most detrimentally, they change how we view God. Every lie we buy into about ourselves is rooted in what we believe about God.” Allen

I relate to all of the lies, but mostly to “I’m helpless.” That lie has been with me all of my life. When you grow up in an abusive home, you feel helpless every single day. I was helpless because I was a child and really couldn’t do anything about the abuse. It was my truth. It was deeply ingrained in me and it definitely distorted my view of God for many years.

When the pandemic hit, the horrible feeling of helplessness reared it’s ugly head. I began to feel trapped like I did when I was a little girl. I felt like something evil was trying to control me again. Then came the anger that something, other than God, was trying to take over my life. My thoughts started spiraling out of control. I knew I had to fight this or I was going to go down a deep, dark hole that I didn’t want to go down.

While I was reading Jennie’s book, my eyes came across these sentences. “Jennie, this is the enemy. None of this is from God. This awfulness you’ve been experiencing…this isn’t who you are.”  I stood up and had to put down the book. I walked around the room with tears in my eyes. I couldn’t believe what I just read. I came back to my journal and wrote down these words. “You mean to tell me that all the awfulness I have been experiencing all my life isn’t who I am? I have just accepted all the fears, the doubts, the panic and the pain as the truth of who I am because this is what I do—I accept lies???”

I have accepted too many lies in my lifetime. I wasn’t able to recognize them and didn’t realize how much they influenced my thinking and the decisions I made in so many different areas of my life. The lies kept me from doing things I knew I was called to do. The lies affected my self-image. But, I think the most damage they did was made me believe that I was not capable of becoming who God wanted me to be. 

Because of the lies, I know I am in a battle with my mind on a daily basis. I can no longer accept the lies that the enemy wants me to believe. I am not helpless because I am a child of God. That is who I am. God is fighting for me—right by my side. I have to tap into the power that He has given me. I have to be led by truth, not by my feelings.

I love what Jennie Allen says. “The people who stand out to me are the ones who have chosen to trust Jesus more than trusting their ability to make everything work out fine.” Boy oh boy does that statement hit me in the face! I must trust Jesus more that my ability or any one else’s for that matter.

In order to trust Jesus more, I must have a plan of action. I have to turn my mind to God’s word and fixate on Him. It’s the only way I am going to survive. The enemy is out there causing so much chaos and fear in so many people. When I listen to the news, that fear rises up in me. I have to walk away from it. I can’t let things like that control me. I know we have to be informed, but not ruled by what is being reported. I can’t be dominated by anyone or anything else but God. I think all of us need to be very careful not to let the news, or anything that is happening around us, sway our thoughts or our feelings.    

When I give in to fear, or anything else, I am allowing something else to influence my mind. I am in a battle every day to not let fear or anything else rule me. I have to attack my thoughts and feelings with God’s truth. I have my good and bad moments. But, I still have the same goal….to be controlled by the Holy Spirit.

I can think some pretty dark thoughts. If I allow those thoughts to control me, then I am doomed. “If our thought lives are the deepest, darkest places of stronghold within us, all hell will try to stop us from being free. We aren’t going to slap on strategies. No, we are going to go to war against the root of darkness within us. And we’re going to have to dig deep to pull that root up. This is going to take work. This is going to take patience. This is going to take buckets of grace for ourselves.” Allen

Change is possible for all of us, but it does take work. There are days when I feel like I am a complete failure, but that is a thought that needs to be covered by grace. I am fighting a lifetime of bad thoughts. “Deadly thoughts can be captured. They can be contained. We can learn to mind our minds. When we think thoughts that lead to life and peace, we don’t get just better thoughts, we get more of God.” Allen

I will be sharing more in my next posts about how to fight the battle for our minds. Let me just say that I have seen and experienced what lies can do to a mind. Satan is out to get us. He has no power over us, but he can tempt us and go after us exactly where he knows we are weak. I have seen it happen right before my eyes. I know how important mental health is and I know that Jesus is the true healer of our minds. I am going to say this one more time. We need to be controlled by the Holy Spirit. Not the news. Not social media. Not fear. Not this virus. Not by what is happening around us. Don’t let anything or anyone else control your thoughts or your mind. Fixate on Jesus and His words!

Until next time….

“For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.” Philippians 1:21